Just Say No!

Many people struggle with saying no. It is often something that society assumes one will learn to do as we get older or after people have taken advantage of us a few times but not necessarily so. Typically, you learn to say no in one area or to a specific person but not overall. I have counseled countless parents through the struggle of balancing work and parenting because they fail to say no. Or, even more popular problem, they say no but do not follow through. You tell your job you cannot stay late at work, but they put you on the schedule anyway. You tell your child “no” they cannot have a snack, but they take it anyway. In both situations you do nothing significant that allows you to reclaim the authority of word and reinforces your limits/ boundaries. The key to standing up to others and saying no is realizing you will have to say no to someone anyway! Many times, that someone you are saying no to includes yourself. When you fail to say no to others you give that other person the authority to prioritize your life and resources. When you let your child take snacks without permission then you are letting them determine what food (a resource that equals money) will be consumed at what rate. With your employer, you allow them to determine how you will spend your time. In both cases you are teaching them they do not have to respect you or what you say. Understand how both means saying no to yourself. Whatever you allow your child to consume means you have to say no to them and yourself later when there is no more left. No goes to